There are many things I enjoy in this life. Unfortunately, often times I don't take the time to do what I enjoy because I'm too busy doing the things I have to do. (See 2 blog posts ago...) One of the things I enjoy more than anything, though, is good conversation and friends. I love getting to know new people and getting a glimpse at what God really means by the body of Christ.
A few months ago a few of my friends invited me to be a part of a new small group from a local church. I was a little hesitant because I didn't know any of the other people involved, but one night out per week with adult conversation sounded fantastic to me, so I tagged along. I have learned so much from these folks. First and foremost, they have welcomed me into their lives with open arms. That is not a totally normal thing to do, as most people have their "friends" and don't make an effort to really make new ones. Not this group, they were very warm from the get-go and it didn't take me long to feel a part of their lives.
It was a quick 6 week study, but we've gotten the chance to hang out a few other times outside of our group and it's been a real blessing to get to know them. Tonight was one of those times, and just the girls went out for some sushi and conversation. This is one awesome group of ladies. What I realized though, as I drove home tonight, was how much I've learned from each one of them. And how neat it is to see so many different personalities come together and share life.
If I'm honest, one of the things God has been showing me lately has been just how task-focused I can be and how I can end up holding others to some kind of unreachable standard. (It's the same one I hold myself to most of the time...which is never a good thing.) So my prayer has been very simple over the past few weeks..."Lord, help me love more." This is one of the things my new friends have really challenged me with (and I don't think they even realize it.) They love well....they love their kids well, they love their spouses well, and they have loved each other (an consequently me) well.
If there is one thing I'm certain that I will get a lot of practice with this summer it's loving other people well. And so I continue with the simple prayer that God gives me His eyes to see where and how I can love whoever I come in contact with. I've heard it said that love can change the world. I want to change the world...one person at a time.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Blemished offerings and a gracious God
I have been really wrestling lately with the concept of living in this broken, messed up world. Honestly, most of my wrestling has been with the idea that God wants nothing less than all of who we are, and yet it is so rare to see someone completely sold out to God. Tonight, God smacked me upside the head with something so I just want to write and see if I can make sense of it.
In Malachi, God really comes down on the Israelites (and especially the priests) for giving up blemished animals for their offering to a Holy God. He says, "Cursed is the cheat who has an acceptable male in his flock and vows to give it but then sacrifices a blemished animal to the Lord. For I am a great king, says the Lord Almighty, and my name is to be feared among the nations." Some strong language God is using here, and it for sure stings.
I can't help but think of how often I take the very best of what I have and use it for me. Or how I give my left-over time to God instead of giving Him my best hours. Tomorrow I am speaking at our high school service on the holiness of God. But one of the things I am talking about is what the fear of the Lord really looks like. I love reading the Old Testament in light of the New. I love thinking about the sacrifice that God gave to us in Jesus and how gracious He is in forgiving us.
But more than that, I love that the fear I have for God is becoming more and more complete awe as to who He is and what He is about. I can't give any excuses for why I often times give God blemished offerings. What I can do is continue to fix my eyes on the grace and love of Christ and automatically my offerings become more pure...not because of anything I did, but because of everything He did. My desire becomes more for Him and less for me. And in turn, He teaches me how to love better...with more purity of heart and intention.
What do your offerings look like?
In Malachi, God really comes down on the Israelites (and especially the priests) for giving up blemished animals for their offering to a Holy God. He says, "Cursed is the cheat who has an acceptable male in his flock and vows to give it but then sacrifices a blemished animal to the Lord. For I am a great king, says the Lord Almighty, and my name is to be feared among the nations." Some strong language God is using here, and it for sure stings.
I can't help but think of how often I take the very best of what I have and use it for me. Or how I give my left-over time to God instead of giving Him my best hours. Tomorrow I am speaking at our high school service on the holiness of God. But one of the things I am talking about is what the fear of the Lord really looks like. I love reading the Old Testament in light of the New. I love thinking about the sacrifice that God gave to us in Jesus and how gracious He is in forgiving us.
But more than that, I love that the fear I have for God is becoming more and more complete awe as to who He is and what He is about. I can't give any excuses for why I often times give God blemished offerings. What I can do is continue to fix my eyes on the grace and love of Christ and automatically my offerings become more pure...not because of anything I did, but because of everything He did. My desire becomes more for Him and less for me. And in turn, He teaches me how to love better...with more purity of heart and intention.
What do your offerings look like?
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Bad Blogger
I know, I know...I've been such a horrible blogger lately. It's not that I don't want to share what's going on, it's just that I have been stretched in so many different directions lately, I have had little time to sit and collect my thoughts.
Which actually brings up a thought...Why is it that we tend to push off the most important things for the most urgent things?? I remember in graduate school going through a time quadrant where we were supposed to label things "urgent and important", "urgent and unimportant", "not urgent but important", and "not urgent and unimportant". And I remember thinking then, 10 years ago, that I often times end up in the urgent and unimportant category just because it seems urgent. And still, 10 years later, I find myself there all too often.
Maybe it's the technology we work with. When an email pops up, I often feel the need to respond right away, regardless of what else I might be doing at the time. Facebook sure hasn't helped either, as I can waste countless minutes/hours messing around...and I can even call it "ministry" because often times I'm chatting with students or sending them little encouraging notes or whatever.
I guess I realized this the other day when I had a spare hour in my day. It was really nice outside so I decided to take my little backpack with a book, my Bible and my journal and walk down to the park. I spent the hour I had, and another half hour that I didn't really have free and just spent time with God...rewinding, relaxing and refueling. It was in this moment that I realized that what I had relegated to the important but not urgent quadrant really is important and urgent if I'm going to be the woman God has made me to be.
I have big plans this summer. I'm leading a trip of 25 high school students and adults to Mexico from June 13-19...and then I'm heading to Jos, Nigeria for almost 5 weeks from July 11-August 15th. God has big plans this summer...not only for me, but for the students I minister to and their families...for the kids in Mexico and the kids in Nigeria that I will meet and have the priviledge of hanging out with. I'm excited. But I'm also very aware that without placing that "down time" in the urgent and important category, I'm going to miss what God has for me.
I was amazed at all God had to say to me in that hour and a half the other day. Tears ran down my face as He reminded me what a treasure I am to Him. Excitement welled up in me as He shared his desire to touch the world through me and countless others who follow His leading. And peace flooded over me as I was reminded that it's not me, but the God who created the universe doing all the work.
Make it urgent...to spend time with your Father...it's the most important thing you will do today!
Which actually brings up a thought...Why is it that we tend to push off the most important things for the most urgent things?? I remember in graduate school going through a time quadrant where we were supposed to label things "urgent and important", "urgent and unimportant", "not urgent but important", and "not urgent and unimportant". And I remember thinking then, 10 years ago, that I often times end up in the urgent and unimportant category just because it seems urgent. And still, 10 years later, I find myself there all too often.
Maybe it's the technology we work with. When an email pops up, I often feel the need to respond right away, regardless of what else I might be doing at the time. Facebook sure hasn't helped either, as I can waste countless minutes/hours messing around...and I can even call it "ministry" because often times I'm chatting with students or sending them little encouraging notes or whatever.
I guess I realized this the other day when I had a spare hour in my day. It was really nice outside so I decided to take my little backpack with a book, my Bible and my journal and walk down to the park. I spent the hour I had, and another half hour that I didn't really have free and just spent time with God...rewinding, relaxing and refueling. It was in this moment that I realized that what I had relegated to the important but not urgent quadrant really is important and urgent if I'm going to be the woman God has made me to be.
I have big plans this summer. I'm leading a trip of 25 high school students and adults to Mexico from June 13-19...and then I'm heading to Jos, Nigeria for almost 5 weeks from July 11-August 15th. God has big plans this summer...not only for me, but for the students I minister to and their families...for the kids in Mexico and the kids in Nigeria that I will meet and have the priviledge of hanging out with. I'm excited. But I'm also very aware that without placing that "down time" in the urgent and important category, I'm going to miss what God has for me.
I was amazed at all God had to say to me in that hour and a half the other day. Tears ran down my face as He reminded me what a treasure I am to Him. Excitement welled up in me as He shared his desire to touch the world through me and countless others who follow His leading. And peace flooded over me as I was reminded that it's not me, but the God who created the universe doing all the work.
Make it urgent...to spend time with your Father...it's the most important thing you will do today!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
The Incredible Easter Story
The Easter story...we've all heard it a million times, right? Don't be so sure. I will never again just assume that becuase someone lives in America, or becuase someone has gone to church their whole lives that they know the story of Jesus' death and resurrection. And I will certianly not assume that they understand all that Jesus did for us through that death and resurrection. Especially not when working with teenagers.
Two quick stories. The first occurred two years ago. I was in a car with a student driving to a soccer game one Saturday afternoon. She was a student who had been around our ministry some, but had not really gotten involved in any of our small groups or discipleship ministry yet. She was a student who had not grown up around church, but surely she knew what Easter was about right? I mean, she had celebrated it every year growing up in an American family. So, I was shocked when I asked her what she thought it was all about and her response was a simple, "I don't know." Wow! Really? You don't know that Easter is about the death and resurrection of Jesus? I suppose I could have understood if she had no clue what that meant for her life...but to not know what it was even about? It threw me off my game a bit. The end of the story is that after that semi-awkward conversation two years ago, this student has accepted Jesus Christ as her savior and has grown a ton in her understanding of who Jesus is. This weekend will be her first Easter as a Christ-follower!!
Second story. I was with a group of teenagers a week ago and asked them if they knew what Palm Sunday was. The answers ranged from "it's about Jesus" to "something that has to do with palm trees." When I pressed them about the rest of the Easter story...they knew some of the basics, but they really didn't know too much about it.
Here's my point. Jesus is the most important figure in history. From a purely secular standpoint we can point to the fact that it is 2009. (If you didn't catch that, our whole dating system changed when Jesus died.) From a Christian standpoint, He is the one on whom our faith hinges. Without the death and resurrection of Jesus, we would have no chance to be with God for eternity. But more and more I notice that our students don't know the story of Easter. They should know the story of Easter.
In the Old Testament, God spoke continuously about the stories that we are to pass on from generation to generation...from a mother and father to their children. We need to be retelling the story. We need to help them to understand the story. We need to be the ones who don't shut up about the story, and how it has impacted our lives. It can make for some very interesting dinner time conversation...so go for it!!
Happy Easter everyone!!
Two quick stories. The first occurred two years ago. I was in a car with a student driving to a soccer game one Saturday afternoon. She was a student who had been around our ministry some, but had not really gotten involved in any of our small groups or discipleship ministry yet. She was a student who had not grown up around church, but surely she knew what Easter was about right? I mean, she had celebrated it every year growing up in an American family. So, I was shocked when I asked her what she thought it was all about and her response was a simple, "I don't know." Wow! Really? You don't know that Easter is about the death and resurrection of Jesus? I suppose I could have understood if she had no clue what that meant for her life...but to not know what it was even about? It threw me off my game a bit. The end of the story is that after that semi-awkward conversation two years ago, this student has accepted Jesus Christ as her savior and has grown a ton in her understanding of who Jesus is. This weekend will be her first Easter as a Christ-follower!!
Second story. I was with a group of teenagers a week ago and asked them if they knew what Palm Sunday was. The answers ranged from "it's about Jesus" to "something that has to do with palm trees." When I pressed them about the rest of the Easter story...they knew some of the basics, but they really didn't know too much about it.
Here's my point. Jesus is the most important figure in history. From a purely secular standpoint we can point to the fact that it is 2009. (If you didn't catch that, our whole dating system changed when Jesus died.) From a Christian standpoint, He is the one on whom our faith hinges. Without the death and resurrection of Jesus, we would have no chance to be with God for eternity. But more and more I notice that our students don't know the story of Easter. They should know the story of Easter.
In the Old Testament, God spoke continuously about the stories that we are to pass on from generation to generation...from a mother and father to their children. We need to be retelling the story. We need to help them to understand the story. We need to be the ones who don't shut up about the story, and how it has impacted our lives. It can make for some very interesting dinner time conversation...so go for it!!
Happy Easter everyone!!
Friday, March 6, 2009
Thanksgiving
Have you ever had an experience where you just can't do anything but thank God for how He's kept you from making big mistakes? I had this experience yesterday, and while I'm not going to share why I had this thought (because it has to do with some people I care about very much), it made me realize that living within the boundries God sets for us is ALWAYS the best thing. I tell teenagers this truth all the time trying to protect them from the consequences that come from living outside of His boundries, but it's very seldom that I step back and take a good look at my life and thank Him for the blessings of keeping me safe. That's where I am right now. I've always been a pretty good kid. (I know I'm not a kid anymore, but a girl can dream, can't she?) And I've been pretty good at following rules. But yesterday what I realized was that it was not me following the rules that has kept me fairly consequence free in my life, it's been God in me...leading and guiding me in making decisions that honor Him and lead to life rather than death.
Not growing up in the church has made me all the more thankful that God pursued my heart when I was 16 years old. And looking back there are a ton of instances I could point to where I was moments away from making some really big mistakes. But God is good and if we are willing to consider HIs plan before our own, He will keep us from making those mistakes. And in the end we can look back and be thankful!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Blessings and confirmation
So, I think I've already mentioned that I'm going to Africa this summer as an intern with Back2Back Ministries. (You can check them out at www.back2backministries.org). This was a pretty tough decision for me because I'm the type of person who really wants things spelled out before I take any kind of a leap. With this one, it was more of a quiet nudging by the Holy Spirit over the past year to be more globally focused. As I've journeyed through this nudging, however, I had no idea where it was going to take me. I've been going to Mexico with B2B now for 4 years and I suppose in my small brain I just assumed that whatever God was doing He was going to lead me to Mexico. But as I followed the leading I felt more and more of a burden for Africa on my heart...and I really have no idea why...the extent of my knowledge before January was what I have seen on TV. I had never researched what was going on in Africa or how I could even begin to be a part of it. Even the child I sponsor through Compassion is on this side of the world in Ecuador.
And yet, Africa just kept coming up. So I threw up another prayer and filled out an application with B2B to spend a month there this summer. And within a week I had heard back that I was accepted and if I still wanted to do it, I was off to Africa. After that phone call came the initial excitement...and then the initial fear. Excitement because God had answered a prayer and I was being offered the opportunity of a lifetime. Fear because in order to make it happen I'd have to raise almost $3,000...more than half of which would have to be raised by the end of March so I could buy an airline ticket.
Now, understand that when you work at a church, you don't want to just walk around asking people for money...especially when your church is going through a huge capital campaign and the economy is not at its best. So, I began praying again for a confirmation that I was really supposed to go on this trip. Well, as of this week, I am excited to report that God has confirmed it. I have over half of my support raised and I honestly did not ask one person to support me. It is so cool to see God working and confirming what I've felt in my heart for some time.
I cannot wait to get to Nigeria and find out what God really has in store...and how I can be a part of His amazingly huge plan for His world.
And yet, Africa just kept coming up. So I threw up another prayer and filled out an application with B2B to spend a month there this summer. And within a week I had heard back that I was accepted and if I still wanted to do it, I was off to Africa. After that phone call came the initial excitement...and then the initial fear. Excitement because God had answered a prayer and I was being offered the opportunity of a lifetime. Fear because in order to make it happen I'd have to raise almost $3,000...more than half of which would have to be raised by the end of March so I could buy an airline ticket.
Now, understand that when you work at a church, you don't want to just walk around asking people for money...especially when your church is going through a huge capital campaign and the economy is not at its best. So, I began praying again for a confirmation that I was really supposed to go on this trip. Well, as of this week, I am excited to report that God has confirmed it. I have over half of my support raised and I honestly did not ask one person to support me. It is so cool to see God working and confirming what I've felt in my heart for some time.
I cannot wait to get to Nigeria and find out what God really has in store...and how I can be a part of His amazingly huge plan for His world.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Warfare
In my bible study today (we are studying Esther by Beth Moore) I ran across a statement that has stayed with me all day. "Because Satan has a limited leash where believers are concerned, his most powerful tactics are psychological. Though he can't possess our minds, he profoundly and destructively influences our thoughts." I had just finished talking with a good friend about this very thing when I read these words.
I have had a tough few months. After having surgery in October for a torn tendon in my ankle, I thought I had dealt with adversity. But when my doctor told me in mid-December that he'd have to go in and do it again because the tendon had re-torn, my spirit was broken. It's bad enough to be on crutches for 6 weeks and then endure 6 more weeks of rehab with the hope of recovering fully and getting back to normal life. But then to find out that I had to do it all over again was a blow that I was not ready for. Now it's 6 weeks into the second recovery and I am still in a bit of a funk. Life just seems harder when you are physically hurt.
What I didn't see until today, and I'm thankful for my friend's words of encouragement and discernment into the issue, is how much room I've given the enemy to play with my mind. For those of you who don't know me, I am a perfectionist and I can get down on myself when things don't go right. I am also very analytical and I try to figure things out and find answers for life's toughest questions. The problem is that there are some questions that don't have answers...or at least the answers require understanding past what we as humans have. And what God asks is that we just trust Him even when times are the toughest.
God has given us strategies to combat negative thoughts. He tells us that we should take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). He tells us not to conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And He assures us that when we bring our junk to Him in prayer with thanksgiving that His peace, the peace that passes understanding, will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:6-7).
Now those are promises that I can hold on to. Those are promises that make me feel like I will make it through this or any other trial that comes my way. I am thankful that I have a friend willing to speak truth to me and walk with me through some difficult times. And I am thankful that I have a God who is so particular and involved with my every day that He would reinforce a specific truth spoken by a friend with perfectly placed words from a bible study for me to read today.
I have had a tough few months. After having surgery in October for a torn tendon in my ankle, I thought I had dealt with adversity. But when my doctor told me in mid-December that he'd have to go in and do it again because the tendon had re-torn, my spirit was broken. It's bad enough to be on crutches for 6 weeks and then endure 6 more weeks of rehab with the hope of recovering fully and getting back to normal life. But then to find out that I had to do it all over again was a blow that I was not ready for. Now it's 6 weeks into the second recovery and I am still in a bit of a funk. Life just seems harder when you are physically hurt.
What I didn't see until today, and I'm thankful for my friend's words of encouragement and discernment into the issue, is how much room I've given the enemy to play with my mind. For those of you who don't know me, I am a perfectionist and I can get down on myself when things don't go right. I am also very analytical and I try to figure things out and find answers for life's toughest questions. The problem is that there are some questions that don't have answers...or at least the answers require understanding past what we as humans have. And what God asks is that we just trust Him even when times are the toughest.
God has given us strategies to combat negative thoughts. He tells us that we should take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). He tells us not to conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And He assures us that when we bring our junk to Him in prayer with thanksgiving that His peace, the peace that passes understanding, will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:6-7).
Now those are promises that I can hold on to. Those are promises that make me feel like I will make it through this or any other trial that comes my way. I am thankful that I have a friend willing to speak truth to me and walk with me through some difficult times. And I am thankful that I have a God who is so particular and involved with my every day that He would reinforce a specific truth spoken by a friend with perfectly placed words from a bible study for me to read today.
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