who's your audience??

Who is your audience? Who are you performing for? What constitutes success in your ministry?

These are great questions for those of us who are performance-oriented. I get sucked pretty quickly into the trap of believing that my success...rather, my worth and value...depends on what I do. You can imagine that often times, for me, youth ministry is very difficult. Teenagers are unpredictable. Teenagers are hard to reach. Their moods are ever changing, as are their feelings about youth group...God...their parents...me. And because of this, they are mostly inconsistent.

I wear my heart on my sleve when it comes to what I'm passionate about, and sometimes, if I get caught in this performace trap, I can get pretty down. I ask the question, "what did I do wrong?" when a ministry event doesn't work. I take it pretty personally...because I put my whole heart into what I love. And yesterday was one of those days...where I just struggled to understand my worth and my purpose. I felt as if I had failed.

I was talking with a friend yesterday afternoon who I used to work with in ministry and he reminded me who I am performing for. What he said hit at the core of who I want to be. If I am doing ministry to be successful, noticed, or famous, I am in the wrong profession. But when we come back to the place where we remember Who it is that we are performing for, we can be certain that our efforts are enough. God has not created me to be successful, He has created me to be faithful. He has not created me to have hundreds of kids following me, He has created me to show whatever kids He puts in my path how to follow Him.

And if I continue to be faithful in the things He places in front of me, always returning to Him in prayer to seek direction and approval, I can sleep well at night knowing that I have done my job. So I toss the same question out to you...who are you performing for? If it's not the King of Kings and Lord of Lords your effort won't mean much in the end.

Encounters with the police...

I've always been a pretty good kid. When I was growing up, I was usually the kid who was too scared to do the totally crazy, law breaking things my friends did. I didn't want to get caught. And when I did do something wrong, I would feel so guilty I usually ratted myself out. This is still true today for me...my heart hates to be in the wrong. I hate to know that I could have been better, and I hate the guilty feeling that goes with it.

Recently, I broke the law and I got caught. I know, I know...what happened to the "good kid" right? Well, my license expired on November 17 of last year. I knew it had expired, but the past 6 months has been a very busy season for me and I just didn't take the time to go get a new license. I was driving very carefully because I knew I was toast if I got pulled over. One day I was driving and I passed a police car, which very quickly got in behind me. I didn't drive more than 1/2 mile more when he flipped his lights on and I knew I was caught. I wasn't speeding, so the only explaination was that he checked my plates and found out I was driving illegally. Ouch. I did it...I was guilty...and as the feelings of guilt and anger and frustration all welled up in me I began to cry. It was a feeling I never wanted to have again.

Now, flash foward to last night. My ticket was paid...I have the cancelled check, and yet as I drove the speed limit past a police officer he pulled in behind me and gave me the lights. My heart didn't sink. I knew I was innocent...I had done nothing wrong. As he made his way to my window I was confident in my innocence and felt strong. He asked to see my license (which is new, by the way) and told me that I had an outstanding ticket and there was a warrant out under my name. Calmly I explained to the officer that I had paid the ticket, had a cancelled check and was not in violation. He took my license back to his car, ran it through and realized that they had just not changed the status on the warrant....I was free to go.

As I sat in my car last night waiting on the officer's verdict, a thought hit me. As humans, we were guilty. We had every right to carry the guilt of our sin around with us. We had every right to cry and feel frustrated at our iniquity...and the punishment of death that comes with it. UNTIL...the debt was paid. And it was...our debt (our ticket for our iniquity) was paid by Jesus Christ on the cross. And we are free...free to live without condemnation or guilt.

The problem is that there is an enemy out there who wants us to still think we are guilty. He wants us to squirm and wonder if we are forgiven. He wants us to try to pay the debt again and again when it is already marked paid. He wants us to be nervous and question our freedom. But Paul tells us in Romans, "there is now therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." And I sat there last night thankful for the debt that was already paid. For when the accuser came after me to try to make me think I was not free, the reality hit me that I had nothing to worry about. I have a clean slate.

Thank you Jesus for paying my debt. Thank you for making me free. Thank you that I don't have to worry about being "caught"...but I am already pardoned!

Discipleship??

So, I've really been thinking about the purpose of the church...what we are here to accomplish and how we do it. I think we, as in the North American church, have gotten very good at programs. We've gotten very good at putting on a show. We've gotten very good at counting numbers. But what I'm finding is that we don't do a great job of discipleship. I was recently captivated, like many others around the church, by the Willow Creek "Reveal" study, where they found (they studied both Willow Creek attenders, as well as attenders from 6 other churches) that numbers don't tell the whole story of spiritual health.



This topic has always been one to peak my interest because at heart many of my gifts are in discipleship, mentoring, small groups, etc. I love to see people, especially teenagers, "get it" and start to "live it". It is my passion that each one of the students who walks through the door of our ministry would have the opportunity to grow placed in front of them. I would hate it if all they saw was a program. Don't get me wrong, we have some great teachers at our church. Our student ministry team is really talented and gifted when it comes to teaching and preaching. But I don't think the messages we give always have the impact we are looking for by giving them. Sometimes students do actually listen to what we say, but if we don't follow those messages up with a conversation where they can really think and act on what was heard, the impact will not be very far reaching.

I believe that we, as student ministry staff and volunteers need to focus our attention on the individual journey of each student. The problem is, and you might agree, that there are only 24 hours in a day and we sleep for at least 8 of those (or at least I do), so how are we supposed to focus on each student when there are so many of them? I am convinced that we are not the only ones who have the ability to do this. I believe that if we focus on a few key students and train them to have these same intentional conversations with their friends, the impact will be much farther reaching. As Mike Breaux so nicely put it, we are looking for a "ripple effect". But it starts with one. It starts with pouring our lives into students in a way that leaves them asking the important questions, challenges them to seek after God, and gives them the resources and instruction to reach their friends. I believe then, and only then, will our ministry gain meaning and purpose in this world and beyond.

One Amazing Evening

Last night my high school girls small group resumed our monthly trip down to Having the Courage to Change. What is it, you might ask? Having the Courage to Change is an arm of City Ministries here in Cincinnati. It is a place of refuge for women who are either just getting out of jail or who are looking for a way to turn an addiction around. It is a faith based organization where the women are there to confront their lives, the choices they have made and gain hope in a future.

What we have found in partnering with this organization is that the women who go through this program are truly amazing. My heart is blessed every time I walk through the door of New Beginnings (which is what they call the first residence of the program). My faith is strengthened as I hear story upon story of God redeeming lives and women walking in new faith. And tears are brought to my eyes as I watch my girls, who come from great affluence and opportunity, have conversations with women from different backgrounds, learning and growing together.

Last night was special. We ate a meal together, which by the way, was amazing (Ms. Elizabeth sure can cook)!! And then we carved pumpkins! It was so fun to see our girls teaming up with theirs to make the best pumpkin creation. What was even more fun was to hear some of the women from the ministry talk about how they had never done that before!! When I heard someone say it, I thought 'you must be kidding?' Pumpkin carving was something I have done since childhood. In fact, I can't remember a Halloween without pumpkin carving. Yet, this was a first for a few of these women. What a blessing it was to be there for that!

I don't have too much more to say about the evening. But I will say this...when we step out of our comfort zones, we end up finding so much substance that can grow us. I know for some of our girls, this was a big step out of their "zone". But I also know that their hearts grew last night. And they were excited. And the first thing they asked was, "when are we going back?" You see, when we connect with people on a heart level, and love each other like Jesus, we find that the walls that society puts up between us are easily knocked down.

Go at it Alone

"Go at it alone!" I've said it many times as a soccer coach. It's not an ideal situation, but it occurs when one of your players finds herself heading toward goal, one or more defenders in the way of pure glory. Teammates are behind, pulling up the rear, but nobody is a better option than just putting your head down and going to goal alone. This is where it gets interesting. If she's a good player, she might beat one, maybe two defenders as she heads toward the goal, but going it alone is one of the more difficult things you can be asked to do as a soccer player. It is a team sport, after all, and there are 10 other players on the field for a reason. Sometimes, though, you find yourself in a situation where you don't have a choice. And you do all you can to try to make it work. But more often than not, you get mugged by a few defenders and find yourself stripped of the ball and flat on your face.

I was at our district game the other night when I heard our assistant coach yell just that at one of our players. Now, mind you, she is one of the best players in the state of Ohio, and if anyone can make it alone, she would be the player you'd want to try. But as the rain was pouring down, after beating one player, she was tossed to the ground by another. She slid about 10 yards like a hovercraft before coming to a stop...soaked from head to toe...her pride certainly damaged in the fall.

I've been working in youth ministry for long enough to know this...going at it alone always leaves you face down on the ground, exhausted, and often times burnt out. But, as youth pastors, we are often found trying to do ministry alone. Why? Some of it is our own fault...we fail to cast vision. We fail to share need. We think we are super human and can handle it on our own. After all, God did call us to save this generation, right? We can certaily oblige by planning events, leading a band for kickin worship, preparing 2-3 messages/small group lessons a week, spending time with students, going to sporting events, plays and band concerts, making sure the youth aren't disrupting the rest of the congregation, planning camps and mission trips, and if we have some spare time ministering to parents to keep them from flipping out about their kids behavior.

And some of it is forced upon us. I mean, really, what adult wants to hang out with junior high kids and their hormones? Most of the time people are more than happy to tell a youth minister what needs to be done, but less than willing to help them do it. And so it just seems easier to go at it alone than beg folks to go at it with you.

Here's what I'm learning, though. God didn't design us to go at it alone. He designed us for relationship. He designed us for community. And this extends to youth ministry. Our students need more than an over programmed youth night where they race to drink a gallon of milk (which, by the way, cannot be done in under an hour) or play table hockey until their fingers fall off. Our students are crying out for relationships that matter. They are crying out for conversations that dig deep. They are in need of someone to walk alongside of them as they journey, pray with them as they hurt, celebrate with them as they win, and love them when they fail.

But we, as youth leaders, are also in need of community, maybe even more-so. It doesn't matter how well meaning or gifted we are. If we don't have a group of adults to minister along side of us, the weight of the adolescent hearts we are trying to reach will become too big of a burden for us to carry. We will so quickly fall back on our ministry training of creating programs to keep everyone happy...but very few will be growing, maturing, and multiplying in their faith. Even Jesus didn't do the work of ministry alone. He had friends, brothers and sisters, to walk with Him. They challenged each other, prayed with each other, and shared the burden of the many tasks associated with loving and caring for others. And in the end, ministry multiplied and more hearts were reached. More people grew and became ministers themselves. And the cycle continued.

My vision, or rather what I believe to be God's vision for His kids...is that each one of them would have someone to walk with. That each one of them would have a place to struggle with the intersection of the truth of God and the reality of their everyday lives. That each one of them would be able to let their guard down with someone who cares and for that moment be real. But for that to happen, none of us can afford to go at it alone. We need each other. We need to pray together. We need to challenge each other and listen to each other. We need to celebrate together and cry together. We need to get real with each other if we want to see our students get real with us.

So my prayer tonight is that God would raise up a community of folks who love students. A community of folks who are willing to lay it all on the line to see a group of teenagers begin to see God. A community of folks willing to be real with each other as we become real with students...and help them to change the world. Will you pray with me?

Amazing Race (Part 2)

Ok, back to the race! Yesterday I shared one of the things I learned about our life journey from reading Hebrews 12:1-2. Today I want to share another piece of this puzzle with you. The second question I always ask when I'm about to run a race is, "what is the terrain?" I need to know if the race is on the road or on grass. I need to know if the race is downhill or uphill or both (and how much of both). Also, I like to know the race course before I set out...only because I don't want to take a detour and end up in the wrong place. All of these things help me in my preparation to run. The answers also help me gague how much energy I need for each part of the race...and make sure I stay on the course.

This is where Hebrews is so helpful to us. The writer says, "lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily entangles us, and run with endurance." The terrain of this life journey is tricky. There are detours all around us that we could take. There are different paths calling out to us and begging for our attention. And it’s hard to continue straight, especially when we start running up hill or through a tough spot in the race.

We can’t run very well with stuff weighing us down. And we can’t run when we keep getting distracted by sin. So I have a question for you today...what is holding you back from running with endurance? Is there a sin in your life that is distracting you? Are you finding yourself spending more time on detours than on the race itself? Whatever it is...if you want to run this race and be successful, you’ve got to toss it! Get it as far away from you as possible. Find someone on this journey with you to hold you accountable for stopping it.

Don’t get distracted. The road is not easy as it is, and if you have stuff weighing you down....it get’s even tougher to finish well and live out the purpose that God already has planned for you. It's a long race, and it's a tough race...but tomorrow we'll talk about the destination and you'll see that guarding your heart and mind against the sin and distractions that so easily entangle us is totally worth the finish line!

Amazing Race

Our student ministry just started a new message series entitled "Reality Check". We're looking at different reality TV shows, comparing their message with the message we get from Scripture and redefining reality based on God's truth. I love this series because it is so applicable to our lives and consitent with the culture in which we live.


Last week we looked at the show "Amazing Race". As I thought on the topic, I couldn't help but wonder what we are running so hard after. I'm what you might call a "gamer". I'm always looking for some way to be competitive. 10 years ago, as my soccer career ended, I took up running. It was just the outlet I needed to clear my head, get some exercise and renew myself. What I discovered, though, was that there was this community of people all over the world who loved to run...and not only that, they loved to RACE!!! I love to race. Even as a little kid on the way to the bus stop all someone had to ask was "race ya?" and I'd take off running for the corner. And racing is still a huge part of who I am. Every year I run at least 10 road races, varying in distances from a 5K to a half marathon. (I'm still too chicken to train for the full marathon, even though I tell most people that I just don't have the time necessary.)

One thing I do know about myself, though is that before I run a race there are a few questions that I need answered. First, how far is it? Second, What is the terrain? Third, What is the destination? I was pondering these questions about the race of life as I sat reading Hebrews 12:1-2. What I found is that this passage answers all of these questions. First, Paul says that we must run the race set before us with endurance. Although he doesn't come right out and say how far the race is, the word endurance tells me a lot. Being an avid runner, I know the difference between an endurance race and a sprint. And many times I've found myself taking off in the beginning of one of these endurance races like it was only 400 yards long and practically passing out midway through the race because I had exhausted myself.

Our Spiritual journeys are the same way. If we take off like it's a sprint, we will find ourselves totally exhausted, unable to finish well. We need to slow ourselves down! We need to take time to rest. We need to spend time with the LORD, letting Him pour into us. If we don't, and I know this from first hand experience, we'll get worn out. We'll get depressed. God becomes harder and harder to see and we wonder why we are running at all. In an endurance race, you don't sprint, and you take water stops along the way...just to refuel and recharge. Our lives need these moments of refueling as well. So, slow down...take your time...life with Christ is a marathon, not a sprint...

Tomorrow I'll talk about the other things I learned about our race while looking at Hebrews...