So, I think I've already mentioned that I'm going to Africa this summer as an intern with Back2Back Ministries. (You can check them out at www.back2backministries.org). This was a pretty tough decision for me because I'm the type of person who really wants things spelled out before I take any kind of a leap. With this one, it was more of a quiet nudging by the Holy Spirit over the past year to be more globally focused. As I've journeyed through this nudging, however, I had no idea where it was going to take me. I've been going to Mexico with B2B now for 4 years and I suppose in my small brain I just assumed that whatever God was doing He was going to lead me to Mexico. But as I followed the leading I felt more and more of a burden for Africa on my heart...and I really have no idea why...the extent of my knowledge before January was what I have seen on TV. I had never researched what was going on in Africa or how I could even begin to be a part of it. Even the child I sponsor through Compassion is on this side of the world in Ecuador.
And yet, Africa just kept coming up. So I threw up another prayer and filled out an application with B2B to spend a month there this summer. And within a week I had heard back that I was accepted and if I still wanted to do it, I was off to Africa. After that phone call came the initial excitement...and then the initial fear. Excitement because God had answered a prayer and I was being offered the opportunity of a lifetime. Fear because in order to make it happen I'd have to raise almost $3,000...more than half of which would have to be raised by the end of March so I could buy an airline ticket.
Now, understand that when you work at a church, you don't want to just walk around asking people for money...especially when your church is going through a huge capital campaign and the economy is not at its best. So, I began praying again for a confirmation that I was really supposed to go on this trip. Well, as of this week, I am excited to report that God has confirmed it. I have over half of my support raised and I honestly did not ask one person to support me. It is so cool to see God working and confirming what I've felt in my heart for some time.
I cannot wait to get to Nigeria and find out what God really has in store...and how I can be a part of His amazingly huge plan for His world.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Warfare
In my bible study today (we are studying Esther by Beth Moore) I ran across a statement that has stayed with me all day. "Because Satan has a limited leash where believers are concerned, his most powerful tactics are psychological. Though he can't possess our minds, he profoundly and destructively influences our thoughts." I had just finished talking with a good friend about this very thing when I read these words.
I have had a tough few months. After having surgery in October for a torn tendon in my ankle, I thought I had dealt with adversity. But when my doctor told me in mid-December that he'd have to go in and do it again because the tendon had re-torn, my spirit was broken. It's bad enough to be on crutches for 6 weeks and then endure 6 more weeks of rehab with the hope of recovering fully and getting back to normal life. But then to find out that I had to do it all over again was a blow that I was not ready for. Now it's 6 weeks into the second recovery and I am still in a bit of a funk. Life just seems harder when you are physically hurt.
What I didn't see until today, and I'm thankful for my friend's words of encouragement and discernment into the issue, is how much room I've given the enemy to play with my mind. For those of you who don't know me, I am a perfectionist and I can get down on myself when things don't go right. I am also very analytical and I try to figure things out and find answers for life's toughest questions. The problem is that there are some questions that don't have answers...or at least the answers require understanding past what we as humans have. And what God asks is that we just trust Him even when times are the toughest.
God has given us strategies to combat negative thoughts. He tells us that we should take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). He tells us not to conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And He assures us that when we bring our junk to Him in prayer with thanksgiving that His peace, the peace that passes understanding, will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:6-7).
Now those are promises that I can hold on to. Those are promises that make me feel like I will make it through this or any other trial that comes my way. I am thankful that I have a friend willing to speak truth to me and walk with me through some difficult times. And I am thankful that I have a God who is so particular and involved with my every day that He would reinforce a specific truth spoken by a friend with perfectly placed words from a bible study for me to read today.
I have had a tough few months. After having surgery in October for a torn tendon in my ankle, I thought I had dealt with adversity. But when my doctor told me in mid-December that he'd have to go in and do it again because the tendon had re-torn, my spirit was broken. It's bad enough to be on crutches for 6 weeks and then endure 6 more weeks of rehab with the hope of recovering fully and getting back to normal life. But then to find out that I had to do it all over again was a blow that I was not ready for. Now it's 6 weeks into the second recovery and I am still in a bit of a funk. Life just seems harder when you are physically hurt.
What I didn't see until today, and I'm thankful for my friend's words of encouragement and discernment into the issue, is how much room I've given the enemy to play with my mind. For those of you who don't know me, I am a perfectionist and I can get down on myself when things don't go right. I am also very analytical and I try to figure things out and find answers for life's toughest questions. The problem is that there are some questions that don't have answers...or at least the answers require understanding past what we as humans have. And what God asks is that we just trust Him even when times are the toughest.
God has given us strategies to combat negative thoughts. He tells us that we should take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). He tells us not to conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And He assures us that when we bring our junk to Him in prayer with thanksgiving that His peace, the peace that passes understanding, will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:6-7).
Now those are promises that I can hold on to. Those are promises that make me feel like I will make it through this or any other trial that comes my way. I am thankful that I have a friend willing to speak truth to me and walk with me through some difficult times. And I am thankful that I have a God who is so particular and involved with my every day that He would reinforce a specific truth spoken by a friend with perfectly placed words from a bible study for me to read today.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Nigeria Bound!!!
So, it's official! I'll be spending a month this summer in Jos, Nigeria! I am both nervous and excited to begin preparing for what I'm sure will be one of the most amazing and stretching times in my life. I am not sure about all I will be doing while there, but the main thrust of Back2Back (the organization I'll be going with) is the "care for today, hope for tomorrow" for the word's orphans. I have been taking my high school students to Mexico with this ministry for 4 years now and have loved every minute of it. And I will have the opportunity to head to Mexico for one last time in June with my students before I head off to Nigeria for a month.
I feel completely blessed for many reasons...one of which is my church, Horizon, has agreed to give me the month off so that I can have this experience. Who does that?
Right now I'm having a hard time putting into words the way I'm feeling. It's actually kind of surreal to think about going that far from home and having the opportunity to participate in God's kingdom work on another continent.
I'm sure I will post more as I process the idea of going and how God prepares my heart for this trip. For now, pray with me that the funds I need to make the trip will come.
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