2010 has been kind of insane. I know I have not been writing much, but this is primarily because I didn't have much to say...until recently. Now I'm not even sure how to say all that I want to say.
I will start by just saying that this spring was difficult. It was more than difficult. I was feeling what many youth pastors and volunteers who work with high school students feel often, and that is just an overwhelming sense of apathy from students. It's the kind of apathy that makes you want to quit your job and work at Starbucks, because at least people get passionate about their coffee. I have a ton of theories as to why our students can be so apathetic about their faith, but that is not what this post is about.
This post is about when God brings us out of a very dry and miserable desert time into a time where He shows us His goodness and glory in a way that we cannot deny. And maybe what I've learned from what I'm about to share with you is that we have to experience the desert to appreciate the rain. And that God is always faithful, even in the midst of a difficult season.
So here goes. It all started with a conversation. My intern, Zac, and I were just sitting around talking one day...actually, if I'm honest, I was venting. I was just at the point where I was frustrated with the way we do church. I was frustrated that it seemed like our kids were more interested in being entertained than having an experience with God. I was frustrated that I felt like I poured out my heart every week to these students and for the most part it felt like I was trying to convince them to love God. I knew that there was more of me than God in any of that, and it was just time to be different. So we prayed. And then an idea came up. I thought, what if we just didn't set anything up on Sunday? What if we all just sat on the floor and asked some really hard questions about what our students were looking for in church and God? What if we opened the Bible and took a good, hard look at the early church and the way they sought after truth? What if we were honest with them about where we were and where we felt they were with this whole deal?
At first we got really excited about this idea...and then nervous. I mean, what if it doesn't work? What if they tell us they just want to be entertained? What if they really aren't interested in growing and being challenged? What then?
Well, to make a long story short, none of those fears were warranted. What God had been stirring in me He had also been stirring in a group of our students. They were receptive and excited about starting a deeper conversation. In fact, they decided that this was how they wanted to do church for a while...to take away the "show" and just have conversations that matter about truth that has the potential to change their lives.
Fast forward one week and we were off to Mexico with 16 of our students. I never could have prayed for what God did in their hearts during this week of service and fun. Our students took a hard look at what center they had been living their lives out of and decided that it needed to change. They came home fired up about what God is doing in their lives, in the world, and what He wants to do in our church. Since then it has been just an outpouring of God's Spirit on our group. Students are digging in deep to Scripture. They are praying for each other and supporting each other in this quest. They are willing to have conversations that are in no way comfortable, but for sure are life changing. I am watching them lean in to hear from God about direction for their lives. It is an exciting time.
I think back to the middle of the spring...the time when I was thinking about becoming a barista at Starbucks...and I am so thankful for a God who gives us strength even when we are in a desert. And I'm thankful that His grace is sufficient...always. I am excited to be able to share with you how this plays out. I can tell you what I hope and pray for...I hope and pray that our students, surrendered to God, will change the world. I know that is a big thing to pray for...but I am learning that with our God all things ARE possible. So, I will pray bigger prayers, trust more and be willing to be used in whatever capacity God wants to use me in. Because ultimately, He is the one who calls the shots...and it's all in His good timing.
